Love Is In Da Blog : love we have shared with lost friends!

Just Fooling Around  With Bee said: So today we celebrate the love we have shared with lost friends!

To those who went

The  scene  a  cafe  in town  we met  for a coffee.  The  usual  kiss on the cheek  coffee  brought  and  then I ventured “What  did  you mean on  the phone, yesterday. Why  don’t  you want  to see my  son’s  wedding photos. ” Looking  me  straight in the eye  she said ” If I  am  not  good enough  to  go to  the wedding  I don’t want  to see  the photos.” It was like  she had  punched me  in the chest the pain was  immense and lasted  for days. I told  her I had  been told  I could  not have any  friends  as  the  guest list  was tight  and as there  were lots of  family  on  my side  I had to be fair  and I had agreed. It was  their  day  after all.

I am not  sure  how I managed  to drink  my  coffee and  chat, I  left  in a daze,  gutted is  the word. That  was it  the  end  of a  twenty  year  friendship ,  three years  later  it  still hurts .

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

To F

Why did  you  change

What  made  you act  so strange.

So  close  we had  been

Through our  trails  we’d seen

Your  words  cut  me like a knife

Then you  walked out  of  my  life.

The  pain cut so deep , deeper  than

The pain caused  by  any  man.

I had trusted  you so  much

We  communicated   with a smile or a touch.

I was  there  for you  when you  needed  me

And  you  had always  helped  when the answer I could  not see.

Your  words  cut  me like a knife

Then you  walked out  of  my  life.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This  second  poem is to Karen  who died  from Cancer in December  2010. You  may  be gone  Karen  but I  will  never  forget  you !

To Karen

         

Karen

I rang her each day for over a year,

I begged to come see her but she would not let me near.

We laughed with each other often but more often we cried.

I wanted to be with with her but her fears, this to me denied.

I begged her to fight it she told me she was tired

I nagged and bullied she said I was fired!

Things never got better she slipped from my grasp

I tried hard to see her but she still refused, so I did as she asked.

Then finally the day came and I got the call

At last I got to visit , not that she knew at all.

I talked of blue skies and beaches and clouds

I did not whisper I told her out loud.

She was struggling for breath then I caught her eye in a moment of clarity

I told her I  loved her she flashed at me   “no pity!”

Her hands were dirty her nails were lined black

Her pain and the squalor are the memories that keep coming back.

I spent four days in her company

I could not believe what I had to see.

I hated  her suffering as she breathed her last,

Sadly these horrid memories stuck in my mind, the ones which I cannot get past.

It was a foggy freezing December day

When we all met at the Crematorium  our goodbyes to say.

To a larger than life, loud colourful girl

Who with a flash of her eyes could set our working day in a whirl.

I sat there sobbing but she had to have the last word

“Get a grip you silly cow” were the words that I heard.

Then as her coffin disappeared for her final bow

She went out  with  a flourish to Queen’s ‘Don’t Stop Me Now’.

Karen 1958 –  2010

This  is  Just  fooling  around  with  Bee  Idea  for  a  February  daily  challenge! To  suit  her  spoilt  inner  child…. and  mine  come  to that so  here  we go! Hold on to your heart!  Join in  here    and  here

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