He’s Out There ln The Garden.

Today is my brother in law’s Birthday. He probably doesn’t know it because he has Alzheimer’s/ Dementia.

My sister looked after him at home for as long as she could but he is now in a home, his condition got too difficult for her to cope with.

I have written quite a few poems on his and others sharing this plight. In his honour and all carers and sufferers I have taken two of my poems and reworked them into one.

Happy Birthday John. © willowdot21

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He is out in the garden with the secateurs again
The flowers are looking nervous and hoping it will rain.

The airing cupboard is wearing a smile
He’s is busy elsewhere so it has peace for a while.

We need to eat, it must be time for dinner.
We have just eaten, have a biscuit, that’s always a winner.

How cruel, how mean, how so unkind
To leave a feeble body and take a beautiful mind.

There are no words that can truly describe
The pain and fear of those trapped, dead, yet still alive.

You can not reason, they know no rhyme
They are gone from us left behind.

The tiny flashes of a knowing eye is just a mockery
Your loved one is no longer who they used to be.

Screams of anger, voices harsh with fists of hate
You try so hard, you have so much on your plate.

There is no more that you can in all honesty do
They may be gone. Can you hold your patience and to their love be true.

He is out in the garden with the secateurs again
The flowers are looking nervous and hoping it will rain.

Tears

This is rebloged from my sister blog. About life , love separation and Alzheimer’s.

So today was Alzheimers Awareness day….in the morning post was a handwritten envelope with a local postmark. Curious ,I opened it carefully to discover a small blue heart with a blue ribbon and a label attached. On the label was a short poem

A heart for you with love I send How I wish this virus would end.

We’ll soon be through the other side With Clayburn Court as our guide

My fingerprint is in this heart to keep us close while we’re apart.

Well……..Tears welled up as I read these words.

After 4 months of lockdown, in Mid August we could go to visit our loved one albeit only in the garden but now we are back to square one as there has been a suspected case of the dreaded Virus.

Thanks to the internet I can see what is happening at Clayburn and I know they are doing wonderful things to keep the residents well and happy,but it is not the same as seeing them in person.

Whilst eating my meal this evening ,listening to the radio, what should be played but Fontine’s beautiful song ‘I dreamed a dream’..once again tears were in my eyes.The words were so telling and could be applied in part to our situation.

All those years of working and raising a family and looking forward to a time when we could enjoy retirement were gone and we only had 15 years when we could relax together when it all crumbled with the onset of Alzheimers. Now after 61 yers of being together we are separated

please visit Tescol here

Thursday photo prompt: Yearning #writephoto

This is part of Sue Vincent’s #writephoto. Yearning.

For visually challenged writers, the image shows a channel of water flowing out to sea, with the sun reflecting on the water

Is it dusk or is it dawn .

He no longer knows

Yet he see the shine on the water as out to sea it flows.

Lost to to us, he is so forlorn.

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Waking she wonders what will today be like

She yearns to talk to him and see recognition in his eyes

He is just like a dizzy child, who her patience tries

Impossible to cope all conversation trite.

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We are strangers he no longer knows us.

Though he has watched me grow for more than sixty years.

He is a prisoner now of lost hopes and fears.

We yearn to have him back.

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Alzheimer’s is a cruel thief

We yearn for a return of memory

Like sunlight on the sea

From it clutches there’s no relief.

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We visited my sister and brother in law today. It was a 12 hour day, full of laughter because if you don’t laugh it would be too sad. My sister robbed of her loving husband and best friend for over 60 years. Alzheimer’s is a curse it affects not only the suffer but everyone they love.

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What time are we going home.

What time are we having tea

A question now often asked of me

Are going out shopping  today

We’ve already been,what can I say.

Image found here

How long do I cook the beans 

What’s the time, more and more

I know that you are still in there

Slipping away slowly, it’s not fair.

Image found here

There is sometimes a light in your eye

Are you remembering days gone by

It so strange you still look the same.

Slipping away, life’s a cruel game.

Image found here

What time are we going home

You can stay I shall go alone.

Stay and have cup of tea with me

There’s​ nowhere to go, we’re home you see.

NaBloPoMo : Dementia , Alzheimer’s Cruel Game.

http://www.healthshire.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/depression-2.jpg

She is not in there she has gone.

Why  search for the beautiful  light that once shone,

She is no  more herself, her soul  has fled

Gone to us, to all purposes dead.

 

How  cruel,  how mean,  how so unkind

To leave a feeble body and take a beautiful mind.

There are no words that can truly  describe

The pain and fear of those trapped dead yet  still alive.

 

 

You can not reason they know no rhyme

They are gone and left us to mourn  behind.

The  tiny flashes of a knowing  eye is  just  a mockery

This is no longer your loved one,  they are no longer who they used to be.

 

 

Screams of anger, voices harsh with  fists of hate

You try so hard, you have so much on your plate.

There is  no more that  you can in all honesty  do

They may  be gone ,  but you can hold you patience  and to their love  be true.

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I have written  this  for http://ramblingsfromamum.wordpress.com/     she needs our hugs.