Book 2 – Bananas Chapter One.

BANANAS

Welcome to another blisteringly cheerful day in Westley Piddle, all fourlegs noshing themselves silly. Including Bananas the happy yellow Pug, and Paddles the neon pink Chow Chow. Fourlegs all living the life. Hundred percent bang on perfect… and it ain’t even rainlicking!  

A particularly cheerful day in Westley Piddle, that unexpected little town on the Thameslick between Bisham and Cock Marsh. Hindlegs are up and wobbling about, scritching good mornings to everything and anything; scratch are lazily licking their murderous long scratchy paws and planning global domination; flaplegs are flapping ‘round abouts everywhere in a blitzkrieg of poop. Life as normal.

Fourlegs, not to be outdone in this struggle of cheerful bon hommie, add their daily morsel of intellectuals to the cacophony – 

Helloooo!

Shuddup mammal

Another day, same poop

And yuz can shuddup an’ all

Oi, trot over here and bark that!

All in all, it’s another particularly dogs-dinner day of unbearable cheerfulness. 

Paddles the overweight Chow Chow wears his cheerfulness beneath a neon pink-coloured fluffy hide.  Newly sprayed, his snout twitching in mild allergies, and getting last minute touches from Lavinka before his presentation to the pedestrians in the big city – West Pid. that is.  She combs his fur over and over til static makes it stand on end in a big electric pink fuzz. Lavinka then ties a Union Jack bandana ‘round his large neck, completing the look with a pair of gold-tinted aviator shades squashed over his small eyeholes. Paddles is transformed into a teddy-bear Elvis Presley, standing foursquare with black tongue clenched between teeth, quietly enduring this ritual of tender loving care.

I think I wanna vomit

“suchabigbeautiful,brightdoggy” scritches Lavinka the busker, known as Squeezy to the intimates – coz of the accordion she squeezes in and out, this way and that.  She grabs his snout in her handpaw and eyeballs him in his huge, frizzy face “rememberPaddles,pedestrianswholovedoggy,lovegivingmoney”

Gottit

Paddles is not sure wot money is but pedestrians sure love throwing little metal things at him when Squeezy starts some squeezy-stretchy action on the accordion and Paddles sits looking lyk a furry rockstar.

Can we go now?

Downstairs and ‘round back of the apartments, Paddles enjoys the first squirtz of the morning as Squeezy unplugs the mowta and growls it out of the lock-up into the early light of day.

That’s better Paddles lifts a fluffy pink rear leg and lets go a solid stream.

To be specific the mobility scooter don’t actually growl coz it’s electric.  Instead, it whines at a high-pitch wot makes Paddle’s short thick earflaps vibrate. 

“comeon,then” and Paddles hops into the space between Squeezy’s footpaws “andlet’sgiveitsomeBoyGeorge”

And off they whine towards West Pid. town center.

Dessert loving in yur eyes all the waaay

They whine off from the lock-up and turn onto the pavement of Hazlehurst Road.

..a man without conviiiic-tion

Odds and sods hindlegs are wobbling out the way of the trundling mowta scritching Boy George – Paddles pushing his pink frizzy face into the gentle wind.  The round hot ball, wotz only just been thrown up in the sky, reflecting off his gold-tinted shades.

…yor wicked words every daaay

Squeezy mowtas towards Short Cut, that stretch of pedestrians-only pavement where all the clothfurs shops are and wot only hindlegs are allowed to wobble about on; wotz a short cut between the High Street and Nelson Avenue.  

..Karma, karma, karma, karma, kar– 

The mowta stops whining. Boy George stops scritching. Paddles leaps off and starts sniffing the street.

‘don’tpooponthepavement,Paddles,pedestriansdon’tlikeit”

Squeezy unclips her accordion, sticking a large paint bucket on the pavement and unfolding the tartan blanket.  She sits on the upturned paint bucket and Paddles sits on the blanket.  Squeezy starts stretching some dog-damn awful wheezy noises and Paddles takes a deep breath.  Let the day begin. Let the pedestrians come and throw thems little metal things. 

“oneforyou” Oskar scritches softly at Bananas “andoneforme”

How abouts one for yu and two for me? Bananas the young fawn-coloured Pug sez to Oskar.

The little hindlegs boy is from Estonia – wot is somewhere just outside Westly Piddle, according to Bananas –sticking his spoon into the wonderfully-sniffy peanut butter and not quite decided who’s going to get the next mouthful.  Bananas lifts her flat snout to the spoon and opens her chops and decides it for him there and then.

That’ll be mine, I reckon she licks the contents off the spoon. The next spoonful follows the same route as the last – straight down her nosh hole.  

Bananas knows that nosh is never more than a snifz away from her chops in the Rebane houseden.  In fact she is one of the few fourlegs in all Westley Piddle wotz not constantly hungry – well, not constantly – nosh being always licked off spoon, handpaw, or from the floor. 

Liisa, Oskar’s older sister,  enjoys pickles and smoked fish – fishes are good for Bananas.

Then there’s Arjom, his older brother, wot enjoys cheeseburgers and fries – cheeseburgers are good for Bananas.

And, there’s packdad wot lyks all sorts of nosh but don’t lyk sticking it anywhere, ‘cept down his own little nosh hole.  This unnatural behaviour is a work in progress for Bananas.  Finally there’s packmommy who don’t lyk much of anything and who certainly don’t lyk sticking nosh down Bananas’ anytime. That’s also a WIP.  But, at least the three pups lyk sticking nosh down Bananas nosh hole and that’s a fine start.  All in all a sort of C+ houseden according to the fawn-coloured Pug, suggesting a lot of improvement room for canine welfare.

Bananas languidly burps don’t let that remaining peanut butter go to waste in the jar, Oskar – Oskar?

But Oskar is already wobbling out into the hallway and pulling on his footpaw covers along with his brother and sister.

Out?  We’re trotting out?

Bananas snifz the rising excitement of the three pups whilst eyeballs the cozy temptation of her favorite cushion good noshing also deserves good sleep straight afters, don’t it?

Before she can happily trot towards her cushion Arjom sweeps Bananas up in his handpaws “nicewalkies” he softly scritches in her black earflap “beforefeedingtime”

Can’t argue with that, s’pose Bananas licks her chops.  Even so she turns large black wistful eyeballs towards her cushion and the unfinished jar of peanut butter on the kitchen table. The front door opens. 

 Alright, let’s make it a short walkies before nosh then, please!

The door shuts in a clatter of footsteps.

Squeezy squiiiz, squeezy, squiiiz the accordion stretches this way and that in endlessly awful noises.

Squeezy’s handpaws are stretching in and out in and out.  Paddles sits perfectly still behind his gold-tined shades, eyeballing wotz going on up and down Short Cut. The squeezy noises are plain horrid but the pedestrians must be loving it coz they keep throwing little metal things.

Not at me he snorts to me, on the tartan!

Snifz yu, Paddles Gitorrf! trots up and bumps snoutz.

Clear off, I’m performing

Oh! GitOrrf! sez well impressed but not clearing off.

The squeezy noises get louder and uglier.

Squeezy don’t lyk interruptions

Uh-huh

Wot comes between the artist and thems pedestrians GitOrrf! don’t know any pedestrians – perhaps they are bit lyk hindlegs or some or some kind of scratch who live in Short Cut. Wotever! all he can snifz are hindlegs wobbling about carrying paper bags full of nosh from the coffee shops.

Brekkers? suggests GitOrrf!, the sniffy paper bags reminding him he’s hungry, again.

Don’t be a muttwit, I’m working, init sighs Paddles but, if yu snifz any of thems sausage rolls then bring us some, know wot I mean?

Righty ho the thought of sausage rolls, wotz part of Greggs all day brekkers, compels GitOrrf! to stick one furry paw in front of the other and wander off following his snout towards his standard morning nosheries.  He is a Border Terrier after all with a snout fully trained to snifz out all  sorts of noshing potentials.

Squeezy squiiiz, squeezy, squiiiz awful noises chase him up Short Cut.

A pedestrian stops wobbling, ohs and ahhs and throws a bit of metal at paddles.  

Not at me – to me, on the tartan!

Paddles snoutz the metal – there’s brekkers snifz rubbed onto it from the hindlegs handpaw.  He stands up, eyeballing Squeezy. She stops her squeezing, struggles up from the paint pot, stretches and wobbles over to the mowta.

Paddles licks his chops.

Squeezy returns with a plastic bag and lays out two bowls on the pavement.  One for biscuits and the other for waterlick.  Brekkers interlude.

Biscuits are good an’ all chomps Paddles, snout buried in his bowl but sausage rolls is waaay better dreamily sniffing Greggs up the High Street.

Squeezy squiiiz, squeezy, squiiiz 

Ffff! Here we go again!

As it happens, another pedestrian wotz wobbling along don’t lyk the squeezy squiiizy sounds, either.

“nonsense,nonsense,nonsense” the pedestrian scritches at Squeezy, waving a handpaw towards Paddles.

Ain’t me wotz doing the squeezings, izit!

“mydog!” scritches Squeezy “Icanpainthimpink,ifIwant,anycolourIwant,okay?”

“nonsense,nonsense,nonsense” the pedestrian scritches aggressively and making Paddles nervous.

Maybe this pedestrian needs a bit of submitting!  But it soon wobbles away and, wotz more, don’t even throw any metal bits.

nexttime,he’llhaveglitter-sprayedballs” scritches Squeezy after the pedestrian “that’sright,glittered!”

Glittered? Paddles turns towards Squeezy balls?

Visit Usual Muttwits

Song Lyric Sunday. November 15, 2020 – Begin/End/Finish/Start

It’s Sunday again and time for Jim Adams Song Lyric Sunday. This week’s prompts are Begin/End/Finish/Start .

I have picked Runtime from Imogen Heap, I may of mentioned her before? It’s about the end of a relationship, the singer wants to finish as it is past it’s sell by day. It has started in it, end , quit , stop , done. A song about finishing a relationship, with the prompts in plus a few synomines all except begin .

Runtime is Sparks is the fourth studio album by English singer Imogen Heap. The album was released, via iMagaphone Records ( her own label, and an anagram of her name) on 18 August 2014, in three editions: a standard edition, a deluxe two-CD edition and a super deluxe box set.

Sparks might fly, in no time.
It’s a delayed reaction of the third kind. (ooh)
I’m so ready for this.
Shrink-wrapped tones, I can face the music.
Stop matters bonding us way beyond
Our best by-days.

You know we’ve had it good, we’ve had it bad, so no hard feelings.
We’ve done all we could and all again. I’m done pretending.
Let’s quit while we’re still friends.

Making up stories that grew to be too tall,
My fortress to forget couldn’t take anymore.
You nearly watched me ruin everything, everything!
There’s a number one rule of don’t-do’s.
Well we knew it all too well.
You were supposed to be looking out for me!
Have you any idea how difficult it’s been?

You know we’ve had it good, we’ve had it bad, so no hard feelings.
We’ve done all we could, and all again. Let’s save ourselves a sorry ending.
You know we’ve had it good, we’ve had it bad, but this is as far as we can stretch.
Let’s stop pretending, stop pretending.
And quit while we’re still friends
[x2]

Well I was so young, misguided maybe.
But still this hands over my every pen to paper.
And this all started with a song.
Let this be our last one.
Drop, drop. Bridge, bridge!

We’ve had it good, we’ve had it bad, but this is as far as we can stretch.
Stop pretending!
And quit while we’re still friends.

I wish you well.
I wish you well… (I wish you well, wish you well, wish you well)

Wish you well, I wish you well, I won’t tell if you won’t tell.
I won’t hold it against you if you bow out gracefully. (gracefully)
Can we just not drag this out, please?
I wish you well, I wish you well, I won’t tell if you won’t tell.
I won’t hold it against you if you bow out gracefully, (do it gracefully!)
Can we just not drag this out?

*******”

So we need Begin …So I am using Imogen Heap again her song Useless.

“Useless”

I am a mirror, with no reflection
I am a razor, without my blade
I am the daylight, when the moon shines no
Who will want to make my sandcastle that’s already made

I feel so useless, do you

Speak to an ear deaf to my voice
Look through your fear, still blind to my way
I reach to hold you, but I don’t feel you there, do you
Even realize I’m here am I just wasting away?
No wasting away
Living, inside you play

My dying prayer, sealed in a scream
Unwelcome, and a conscious dream
I am your whore, without a name
I climb to fall, to begin again, to begin again
I climb to fall, suffer, hatred, deceit and pain
Anger, regret, loving in vain

I am an arrow, with no direction
My life your tarot, my picture your fate
I’m your becoming, so ill always be nothing
If i ever break away from you that day forth, you’ll be living
My hate
Oh God help his fate
I’ll watch you, watch you suffocate.

Both sets of lyrics reproduced by AtoZ lyrics

Happy Sunday Everyone.

The Friday Reminder and Prompt for #SoCS Nov. 14/2020

I have written two Acrostic poems with different definitions for todays #SoCs challenge from Linda. The prompt. Your Friday prompt for Stream of Consciousness Saturday is “ring.” Use it as a noun, a verb, an adverb, or an adjective…use it any way you’d like. Have fun!

Photo by Megapixelstock on Pexels.com

Round like a circle it never ends

Intwining us within its resonation

Never ending it will bind

Gathering us to it’s heart.

Ringing in my head

Impetuous words said

No going back you shouted

Get on the phone we can fix this undoubted

*******

Join us at LindaGHill’s Stream of Consciousness Saturday

Badge by Shelley Krupa

QUICK PINT DOWN AT THE PIG & FERRET PUB.

I not against small dog.  Many home have small dog – and in my home is small dog.  What to do? Estonia we like big dog.  Proper dog is Eesti Hagijas, you call Estonian Hound. Yes? What is not small dog, not big dog, but half a big dog.

With three childs, one wife and small house we must have small dog. Worse, small dog name Bananas.  Yes, stupid name I think.  Good Estonia name for dog is Mimmi, Tontu or Spartak, yes? Bananas only good name for yellow fruit.

What you mean by Bananas is small dog yellow also, huh?

Coming to this blog next week.

Check out The Usual Muttwits

A Quick Pint Down the Pig & Ferret

You never sipped vegan beer?  You are missing something very special my friend. There’s so many and from big names, too.  Carlsberg, Stella, Heineken and others, I think. And non-alcoholic, umm, I think, isn’t that right Mayumi my little precious?

Yes, she’s such a sweet doggy.  Always does what she’s told.  Always sleeps when we sleep.  Always eats vegan – and loves it!  And don’t bark a lot.  Hate dogs wot bark a lot, don’t yu?Yeah, me boyfriend’s from the Middle East.  They love dogs out there. And me grandparents are from China.  And, umm, they love dogs out there…

Do visit The Usual Muttwits at Westly Piddle.

Wordless Wednesday

Sue Vincent’s #writephoto. Poised

Hi everyone just a quick note if anyone would like to re-post any of their old #writephoto prompts please do. While Sue is not posting a photo prompt due to not being well, she would love to see old ones reposted.Now if you would like to join in please use the #writephoto badge

For visually challenged writers, the image shows a leaf-strewn flight of stone-cut steps descending into a hole in the ground. Poised to ascend…or descend… is the dark silhouette of a strange figure. I see a Rabbit!

Tick tock pocket watch

Who’s coming up the stairs

Tick tock stop the clock

Alice’s new friend appears.

Moving fast, Hurry hurry

Milliners licking lips, in a flurry

Time for tea, guests unaware

All laced with Mercury, mousey sleeping in his chair.

Jam tarts Queen of Hearts

Keep her smiling don’t let things fall apart.

Tick tock, chip Chop

Look out it’s heads off.

Alice is sleepy now

Home in bed wipes her brow.

Tick tock pocket watch

Who’s poised to climb the stairs?

**********

This is part of Sue Vincent’s #writephoto

Ronovan Writes Décima Poetry Challenge Prompt No. 31: (ONE) in the A rhyme line.

Ronovan Writes Decima Challenge Image

You may, if you wish, make some kind of link between the Haiku Challenge prompt of (FIRST & Heal). and ONEI think these might work together with the right story idea.

The two challenges are separate but can be combined if YOU CHOOSE to do so.


Welcome to the Décima Poetry Challenge. Each week we’ll be attempting a Décima, also known as an Espinela, poem.

If you don’t know how to write a Décima, click HERE to go to a post on How to Write an Espinela or Décima Poem.

FIRST & Heal

I adhere to rule number one
Above all else we must do no harm.
Alliences cause such alarm
To reach out until hate is gone
First together as in song.
The end of an era at last
To a new future let’s hold fast
Can we eradicate all sin
Can God’s patience heal from within .
Have we joined the devil’s repast.

Rememberance Day. 2020

Image from here

High Flight 

Oh! I have slipped the surly bonds of Earth
And danced the skies on laughter-silvered wings;
Sunward I’ve climbed, and joined the tumbling mirth
of sun-split clouds,-and done a hundred things
You have not dreamed of-wheeled and soared and swung
High in the sunlit silence. Hov’ring there,
I’ve chased the shouting wind along, and flung
My eager craft through footless halls of air….

Up, up the long, delirious, burning blue
I’ve topped the wind-swept heights with easy grace
Where never lark nor ever eagle flew-
And, while with silent lifting mind I’ve trod
The high un-trespassed sanctity of space,
Put out my hand, and touched the face of God

*********

This poem was found in many of the Kriegies’ YMCA issued diaries.    Written by John G. Magee on September 3, 1941.  Magee was born in Shanghai, China, of missionary parents-an American father and an English mother, and spoke Chinese before English. He was educated at Rugby school in England and at Avon Old Farms School in Connecticut.  He won a Scholarship to Yale, but instead joined the Royal Canadian Air Force in late 1940, trained in Canada, and was sent to Britain. He flew in a Spitfire squadron and was killed on a routine training mission on December 11, 1941. The sonnet above was sent to his parents written on the back of a letter which said, “I am enclosing a verse I wrote the other day. It started at 30,000 feet, and was finished soon after I landed.” He also wrote of his course ending soon and of his then going on operations, and added, “I think we are very lucky as we shall just be in time for the autumn blitzes (which are certain to come.

*********

This poem is almost a prayer. It is as soft and light as it contents and as deep and heavy as it contents, too. Full of references to cutting the bonds of earth, soaring high on emotions like laughter, delirium, joy mirth. Dancing flying swooping and flying higher than birds. Reaching the edge of space. Then that last line , a line that says it all for me . Where never lark nor ever eagle flew-And, while with silent lifting mind I’ve trod The high untrespassed sanctity of space,Put out my hand, and touched the face of God.

Such beauty written about such a deadly subject. Planes carrying bombs to flatten hillsides , villages, towns and cities……. Such a contradiction. Words of one who had not flown in war’s true theatre.  If you would like to learn more about John G Magee  read here

#TANKA TUESDAY POETRY CHALLENGE NO. 202 SYNONYMSONLY

WELCOME TO TANKA TUESDAY!

This week, Kat Myrman, from Like Mercury Colliding, selected the words:

I have written about the world as it is today. I am asking nature to help my children and grandchildren, everyone else’s too. We would be so grateful if we could have a better world. I have used synonyms for the two prompt words as well as counting my syllables.

Imagine & Gratitude

A
Life where
Thankfulness
Is not a dream
But reality.
Let’s make believe it’s true
No war,plague, famine or hate.
In my dreams I hear you saying
Is it too much to picture real peace.
I would really appreciate normal

This is part of Colleen Chesebro’s Tuesday Tanka.

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