If we were having coffee: Farewells , Funerals and Life

If we  were  having  coffee:

If we  were having coffee:The  weather  is  getting  distinctly  wintry, fogs, rain, frost  and  cold so  lets  all go inside  and  be  comfy by  the fire. Paul  and I  can  still entertain  you  all  with tea  and coffee  from all over  the world not to mention all our cakes  and muffins  and  as Paul  calls  them sweets! Every single  one  is  calorie  free! Plus of course  we now have spirits  and liquors  to warm the coldest of  you.

If we were having Coffee: I would  remind  you  that  there  are lots of  other  coffee mornings  all shared  and organized  By  Diana  and  Gene’O  over at,Part time monster

Do join in

If we were having  coffee: I would have  to  say  take  me  as  you  find  me, don’t  get  me  wrong  I  am delighted  that  you  have  all come. I truly  look forward  to  these  gatherings they  are one of my  weekly  treats. The  truth is I  am not  fully  recovered  from  the  funeral.May I  speak  a little of  it? Has  every  one  got  the  drink of  their  choice  and  a cake  or  biscuit, I  am having  a  hot  chocolate  with brandy.

If  we were having coffee:  We all arrived  on  the  Monday, while  some of  the  family  where  clearing out  M’s  house and  belongings  hubby  and I  had  the  better  task  (  though in  truth  it  was not  a task  at  all in fact it  was  a real pleasure ) of  entertaining  my cousin  and her  husband. We went  for  a walk along  the river  and  talked  about  M  and  the  family, my  cousin’s side  of  the family  ( my mum’s) then  we started on Grandparents  and  great grand parents. In  the  evening  we  all  went  for  a  meal in  a local  pub, it  was strange  to  feel  so happy  and  to  have  all brothers,  sisters,  in laws, nephews, nieces  and  children  tight  around us. Why  had  we left  a gathering like  this  until  the  night before  the  funeral…. why?

The  day of  the  funeral  was heartbreaking.  I accompanied  my  sisters  and one  cousin  to  see M , I could  not  stay in  the  room where  she  was  laid out in  the  coffin.  It  hurt me  so  to  see  the tiny  empty  shell, all that  was left of  my  beautiful  sister. Then it  was like  an interminable wait  until the  actual  funeral. I was grateful  that  all three  of  our  sons  came  they  were  a great  comfort  and  support. They  made  the hubby  very  proud.   Nine out  the  thirteen  nephews, nieces  and godchildren came  to  the  funeral, a  testimony to how much  she was loved. The  church  was  full  and  everyone  stayed  after  for  tea and  refreshments, so  many  people  and  they  all had  lovely  stories  to  tell us  about  our  sister M.

In  the  evening  we  all went out  for  another  meal  to  celebrate her life. There  were  more of  us  there  that  night  and  again  it  was a happy  occasion we  all told  stories  and  shared  memories . I did  wander if  this  was right  to  be happy  after  a funeral. Then after  some  thought I realized  that Mary  would be  so happy  that  we  were  all together  and  happy.

If  we were having  Coffee : Well another  cuppa anyone? I promise that  even  though  I  am still reeling  from  all of  the  above  I  shall not  mention it  again, unless  asked I know  it  happens  to us  all and  that  it  happens all day  every  day  but  it is  the  first time I  have lost  a sibling.

If we  were having  coffee: I  would  say  that  the  rest  of  this  week  after  Wednesday have  past , shopping  , cleaning, going to  the gym, cooking.  I have  made it  thus far and  no  doubt  I  shall come out  the other side  and get on  with life.

We have  also  over  the last  month  had  a  new  kitchen  installed, it is  beautiful and  when I  can  concentrate  on  it  I  shall show  you  it… it is  not  finished  yet.


Part of the new Kitchen

And of course  the


over at Part Time  Monster  and Gene’O’s


34 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Brenda Davis Harsham
    Nov 08, 2015 @ 01:19:32

    Congrats on new kitchen and condolences. Your photo of the afternoon tea is so colorful. I hope you’re well, Willowdot! XOXO


  2. cordeliasmom2012
    Nov 08, 2015 @ 01:50:55

    As hard as the funeral was, you will always remember all those people who came to pay respects to your sister, and to tell you their wonderful stories about her. She must have been a very special lady to have engendered such love that the church was full.

    PS: I love your new kitchen. Bake me some cookies whenever you’re ready.


    • willowdot21
      Nov 08, 2015 @ 07:19:52

      Thank you CM for your wise words. You are right and that is a memory I can keep and I will . When the kitchen is finally ready cookies will be cooked!!


  3. Lynz Real Cooking
    Nov 08, 2015 @ 11:02:14

    Thanks for sharing!


  4. Lynz Real Cooking
    Nov 08, 2015 @ 11:05:23

    Dear Willow, thank you for sharing this with us! I know it will take you time to feel better:) It sounds like a truly beautiful occasion although so sad! I am glad everyone was there and you shared memories and laughing and talking about her!! A huge hug from me to you!! I am happy you are talking about it because as you said we all go through it and we are your friends! 🙂


  5. morgaine620
    Nov 08, 2015 @ 18:05:55

    Hi there sending you a hug :-). I believe it is ok to be happy even at a funeral. Both is necessary: the sadness to have lost but also the happiness to have had.


  6. Lauren, Wake Up Your Luck
    Nov 08, 2015 @ 20:18:49

    I can’t imagine losing my sister – it must be one of the worst feelings in the world. I can’t think of any comment to leave you comfort, but didn’t want to leave without saying anything; simply put, I’m so sorry that you’ve had such a week.

    It is good that you all had the chance to share happy memories together, and I hope with time that those will be the overriding memories.


  7. Diana
    Nov 08, 2015 @ 20:41:32

    So sorry about your sister—wishing you comfort during what I can only imagine is an incredibly difficult time. ❤


  8. Dale
    Nov 09, 2015 @ 19:43:47

    Willow! How lovely to find you in this little group. First off, I send you my condolences on losing your sister. I don’t even want to think of losing either of mine.
    I truly believe funerals should be celebrations of the person’s life. If I had had connections, I swear I would have held Mick’s (my husband) funeral in a pub (like in P.S., I Love You!) I didn’t, yet I still served beer and chicken wings as he would have liked. We spent a lot of time laughing through our tears because his life, way too short, was filled with good and he touched so very many people. I choose to focus on all the wonderful times we shared in the almost 20 years we were together and move forward. And I am. As you will.
    Love your kitchen (the little snippet we can see!)
    So happy to have found you here for coffee talk – I just started this week…


  9. socialbridge
    Nov 10, 2015 @ 08:16:15

    Willow, I’m sure you must be exhausted from sadness as well as all the activity around the funeral. So glad you could feel genuine happiness and make no apologies, your sister was your sister and you have every entilement to grieve.
    Hope you get a chance to take it easy. XX


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