Love Is In Da Blog : love we have shared with lost friends!

Just Fooling Around  With Bee said: So today we celebrate the love we have shared with lost friends!

To those who went

The  scene  a  cafe  in town  we met  for a coffee.  The  usual  kiss on the cheek  coffee  brought  and  then I ventured “What  did  you mean on  the phone, yesterday. Why  don’t  you want  to see my  son’s  wedding photos. ” Looking  me  straight in the eye  she said ” If I  am  not  good enough  to  go to  the wedding  I don’t want  to see  the photos.” It was like  she had  punched me  in the chest the pain was  immense and lasted  for days. I told  her I had  been told  I could  not have any  friends  as  the  guest list  was tight  and as there  were lots of  family  on  my side  I had to be fair  and I had agreed. It was  their  day  after all.

I am not  sure  how I managed  to drink  my  coffee and  chat, I  left  in a daze,  gutted is  the word. That  was it  the  end  of a  twenty  year  friendship ,  three years  later  it  still hurts .

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To F

Why did  you  change

What  made  you act  so strange.

So  close  we had  been

Through our  trails  we’d seen

Your  words  cut  me like a knife

Then you  walked out  of  my  life.

The  pain cut so deep , deeper  than

The pain caused  by  any  man.

I had trusted  you so  much

We  communicated   with a smile or a touch.

I was  there  for you  when you  needed  me

And  you  had always  helped  when the answer I could  not see.

Your  words  cut  me like a knife

Then you  walked out  of  my  life.

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This  second  poem is to Karen  who died  from Cancer in December  2010. You  may  be gone  Karen  but I  will  never  forget  you !

To Karen

❤   ❤     ❤     ❤

Karen

I rang her each day for over a year,

I begged to come see her but she would not let me near.

We laughed with each other often but more often we cried.

I wanted to be with with her but her fears, this to me denied.

I begged her to fight it she told me she was tired

I nagged and bullied she said I was fired!

Things never got better she slipped from my grasp

I tried hard to see her but she still refused, so I did as she asked.

Then finally the day came and I got the call

At last I got to visit , not that she knew at all.

I talked of blue skies and beaches and clouds

I did not whisper I told her out loud.

She was struggling for breath then I caught her eye in a moment of clarity

I told her I  loved her she flashed at me   “no pity!”

Her hands were dirty her nails were lined black

Her pain and the squalor are the memories that keep coming back.

I spent four days in her company

I could not believe what I had to see.

I hated  her suffering as she breathed her last,

Sadly these horrid memories stuck in my mind, the ones which I cannot get past.

It was a foggy freezing December day

When we all met at the Crematorium  our goodbyes to say.

To a larger than life, loud colourful girl

Who with a flash of her eyes could set our working day in a whirl.

I sat there sobbing but she had to have the last word

“Get a grip you silly cow” were the words that I heard.

Then as her coffin disappeared for her final bow

She went out  with  a flourish to Queen’s ‘Don’t Stop Me Now’.

Karen 1958 –  2010

This  is  Just  fooling  around  with  Bee  Idea  for  a  February  daily  challenge! To  suit  her  spoilt  inner  child…. and  mine  come  to that so  here  we go! Hold on to your heart!  Join in  here    and  here

Love is in Da Blog