TUSCANY DITTY

Golden fieldsOnce upon an Italian holiday

These plaintiff words I did say

I think that I have never seen

A sadder sight then fields of sunflowers gone to green.

But this year nature is happy and mellow

And all around are fields of sunflowers bright and yellow.

Back soon

Right I am not going to beat about the bush. I am not sure if I shall be blogging or commenting for the foreseeable future. I shall be around and I am okay so please don’t worry about me I am fine and I wil be taking a holiday.
Love to you all willowdot21 xxxx
iHugs for now.

Useless

 

White  her wings of feathers light

She prayed would bare her up into the night.

But her brown roller skates of steel and leather

Would never help her escape the stormy weather!

 

Tethers

She  tried, she tried to leave the ground

But her tethers were just too profound.

Her wings of gossamer now thread bare

Had lost all shape and begun to tear.

 

No hope had she that she could fly

http://ih3.redbubble.net/image.4324780.4325/flat,550×550,075,f.jpg

No more than the birds above would let her up into the sky.

Her head bleeding her body splinting

She had no hope left, she was a lamb duck sitting.

 

Hope and faith had waved goodbye

They had left her out there to die.

And yet she yearned to fly to join the birds up in the sky.

If she could only escape the bindweed  and fly.

 

Hopeless

Looking back that second before she took the leap

She smiled into the mirror  at the thought of that creep

Ten she turned ,and widened her smile and addressed her fate.

By the time they found her it was of course too late.

http://www.southwestart.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/terry-strickland-flying-dreams.jpg

Pointless

Living with emotional crippledom is hard work , yes it gets no harder. At some point you simply cannot deal with the stress and the fear anymore. You just never know what will tip them over the edge. You get so tired of coping with family “do’s” you get so tired of holding that strained smile, pretending all is well, all the while knowing it bloody well is not.

Tired of being jealous of other families who seem happy  to all appearances, my bitchy side hopes that they are as bloody miserable as I am. My kinder side praying that that their happiness, togetherness, relaxedness is real. OH! God it must be real I pray the world is not as wretched as I am, I pray all marriages are not as taught, fraught  and stretched to the limit as mine is.  crawling across glass bleeding bleeding .

It never gets any better you pray it will you beg God it will but it doesn’t . What is the point , what is the point , what have I done done that is so bloody wrong? Hopeless, pointless no hope.

Trapped under ice.

Trapped under ice

I’m bleeding,  under ice.

I can’t find the crack

Can’t breath I’m loosing track.

 

Splitting ice, but I can’t get out

No one hears even though I shout.

Trapped, cracking up loosing all

Can’t breath as I slip and fall.

Scarlet

enough

enough

Tired, fading to red

Blurring at the edge near dead.

We screamed our hate

Too tired to fight my scarlet fate.

A Nonnette to the Raven and the Heart

Take my heart for it I  no longer need

I see your hunger, your eyes show greed

Take rip it apart , tear it , feed!

Just leave  my eyes for tears

And facing up to fears.

My feelings long gone

A forgotten song

So Raven

Feast.

Peace

The sun shines warm and strong

The washing on the line dances, it will be dry before long!

The birds are twittering and singing

Bees around the flowers buzzing  gently, no thought of stinging.

Children are playing along the road, they must be home from school.

Time , time  my enemy always too fast, too slow never anybody’s fool.

I feel rested in the sun , relaxed maybe this is a new journey I have begun

Nothing to worry about anymore, nothing to rush for, nothing to come.

Gently things begin to fade, is this it or is just that I am lying in the shade

No I can no longer move , here comes the silent  peace I crave.

I am happy that there will be no more treatment or  pain

I am sorry for those who I love that will have to remain.

The sun shines warm and strong

The washing on the line dances it will be dry before long!

The birds are twittering and singing

Bees around the flowers buzzing  gently no thought of stinging.

I hope  they will not think me selfish, I could really fight no more

Here comes death to claim me and I feel safe as he leads me to his door.

Peace, peace  no pain, no needles  no scans  no sad sad smiles

I am going now, I love you all and I shall be here but  not seen, loving you  all the while……………….

 

Just a little explanatory  word. I wrote this poem this afternoon, I do not know where it came from I just wrote it. It is about a person dying peacefully of some disease  say Cancer. I have not known any of my lost friends who have passed this way  but I wish  it could be like this . I wish death could of been gentle for them and for all of us ……….. please.

 

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