Living with emotional crippledom is hard work , yes it gets no harder. At some point you simply cannot deal with the stress and the fear anymore. You just never know what will tip them over the edge. You get so tired of coping with family “do’s” you get so tired of holding that strained smile, pretending all is well, all the while knowing it bloody well is not.
Tired of being jealous of other families who seem happy to all appearances, my bitchy side hopes that they are as bloody miserable as I am. My kinder side praying that that their happiness, togetherness, relaxedness is real. OH! God it must be real I pray the world is not as wretched as I am, I pray all marriages are not as taught, fraught and stretched to the limit as mine is. crawling across glass bleeding bleeding .
It never gets any better you pray it will you beg God it will but it doesn’t . What is the point , what is the point , what have I done done that is so bloody wrong? Hopeless, pointless no hope.
willowdot21 