Bleeding heart

Is it really all me, am I really the ignorant bitch, is that all you see. Will the never knowing which way you will react ever become easy. Will it relax my brow and my stomach un- impact. These deep cracks across my face caused by fear, your kindness could so easily relax and erase.

Ever present stress has become the norm I check what I say from dusk to dawn. Yet no matter how hard I try I mess things up, you shout, I cry. Why do I stay I am not sure I have asked myself this a thousand times or more.

I try to keep you happy I flatter and I calm. I do everything I can to keep you from harm. All the good I do gets blown away  by a simple word or an utterance, a stupid action or sentence thrown away.

Your words are harsh your words are cruel your actions can reduce me to jelly and make me look a fool. Your demands can spoil any day things must go your way, no grey for you no shades, you can gut me, disembowel me drag my faults out and them display.

What am I just a bleeding heart put on this world for you to tear apart. I am so tired so very tired I would leave escape if I were smart. But we both know we shall not part for you  have tight the strings of my heart. You knew that from the very start..

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