The Helper

agony, anguish

Sitting in the shower her body full of fear, no amount of steam or water can hide the fact that he is here. He has been stalking in the hallways waiting on the stairs he never tires of waiting and he’ll catch you unawares.

There’s no good hiding in here, deep breath, get to your feet. Dry your hair wrap yourself in a towel your destiny you have to meet. Get dry, get dressed get made up you need to look your best.

She walks into the kitchen he is sitting in a chair sipping a cup of her coffee. Against all odds she jumps to see him there. There is no point in speaking for he will not hear, he never listens to her he will not just disappear.

Reaching for a coffee she dreads another day but she needs some strength if she is going to get through work and not run away. Sitting down and sipping her coffee she looks him in the eye and with that sinking feeling she knows someone else will die.

Walking to the bus stop he follows her close it is raining again the bus is late they both get soaking wet. God she hates this weather most! The bus arrives and it crowded they only just get on. The other passengers seem agitated they all seem to sense some thing is wrong.

At last her stop arrives and they both alight still she has not said a word to him, it just would not be right. Walking through the corridors waiting for the lift no one wants to stand next to him so they hover and they shift.  As she takes her coat and boots off she turns to him and says “if I change my job would you leave me alone would you go away”  He looks at her intently placing a cold hand on her arm “no it would make no difference I will always follow you ” his voice both gentle and calm

Starting her shift she smiles to  her working friends and notes and orders are passed along, her mind keeps asking will this ever end. Slowly starting her rounds she smiles and offers cheer the patients all love this nurse they all feel safe when she is near. Checking charts and temperatures and helping people to the loo the morning passes quietly, while he stands quiet, she has so much to do.

Sitting outside in the garden with him she shares her lunch she turns to and asks as he on a sandwich has a munch. “Why must I see you, why must I know that you are there. You have been with me all my life just tell me is that fair.” He turns again to look at her and he gives her a radiant smile. “So you can help those I have to take, you are with them and you show them care.” putting down his sandwich he goes on to say, “this is what you were born for and it has always been that way, you started off with animals while you young, we waited till you were old enough and then your real job begun”

making the difference

Later that afternoon she looks up to see him sitting on some ones’ bed,tears bite her eyes which she must hide sadness flooding in her head. She walks across and takes the young woman’s hand and she smiles and whispers gently and makes the woman understand. There is nothing to frightened of nothing to fear,  this kindly hooded gentleman will soon be taking her away from all this pain she will feel so much happier and  relieved and she will see all those she loves in the future again.

On the way home she asks him is she the only one , “why no ” he says ” there are many like you, like rays falling from the sun”  “I am so tired and sad please is there another way”  she sobs “No I am sorry but you will find it get easier every day!

Another Day

Sitting in the shower her body full of fear, no amount of steam or water can hide the fact that he is here. He has been stalking in the hallways waiting on the stairs he never tires of waiting and he’ll catch you unawares.

18 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. zendictive
    Jan 19, 2012 @ 23:10:51

    whip them with your mind (~_~)


  2. granbee
    Jan 19, 2012 @ 23:44:50

    Amazing essay on being a nurse and followed by Death. Of course, it could just be St. Peter waiting to check people in! I have friends who are nurses in intensive care units and pediatric intensive care. They sometimes walk into Walmart looking like this poem describes a nurse feeling, like you show in this photo. Outstandingly brave job!


    • willowdot21
      Jan 20, 2012 @ 15:06:07

      Yes it is a hard job. I wrote this because my sister retired from nursing last year and she always amazed the younger staff by knowing which patients where near to death and she would go and sit with then and either read to them or if they were alert enough she would just sit and talk with them. I did elaborate and add Death. I am glad you liked ( if that is the word) reading it. xx


  3. Eric Alagan
    Jan 20, 2012 @ 05:13:25

    He can’t help himself, at least yours will be done but he…he’ll just be damned.


    • willowdot21
      Jan 20, 2012 @ 15:08:58

      I take it you mean I will die but poor old Death he will be stuck with the tiring job until the last one of us is gone… what will happen to him then?/


  4. catcherofstars
    Jan 20, 2012 @ 23:22:15

    Intense, if that is how it feels then I don’t believe I would be strong enough to be a nurse, interesting perspective 🙂


  5. kate58
    Jan 21, 2012 @ 08:47:32

    Eerie. Nurses have a hard job, I’ve much respect for them.


    • willowdot21
      Jan 21, 2012 @ 11:52:48

      They do and they have to work so hard. Some do let the side down but many more do all they can to care and ease the pain and fear of serious injury or illness and even just to reassure on the simplest things, say when a child has slipped and fallen. If all nurses took the time to care and explain a lot of wasted time could be avoided! I based the poem loosely on my sister, retired now, but she had a sense for those who were about to die and she would tend to and stay with them and help their passing.


  6. Vampire Weather
    Jan 21, 2012 @ 19:08:08

    “tears bite her eyes”… your explanations and visual energy is always riveting! A brilliant read, my friend. Thank you for sharing these strong thoughts.


  7. lostupabove
    Jan 23, 2012 @ 10:09:09

    Eery poem, death as a stalker, the fear always present, not for her own death, death has become her neighbour, but for the other that will die. Magnificent!!.


    • willowdot21
      Jan 23, 2012 @ 18:40:27

      Thank you it is based on my sister, she is retired now but she always seemed to know who to sit with , who needed extra care as they past over.I just embellished on the thought.


  8. lilyklynn
    Jan 26, 2012 @ 09:40:19

    This was chilling.


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