The Mess in the Alley

cold and damp

It’s finally stopped raining but your jeans are soaking wet and if it were not for the tricks men make you turn you’d be worried about the cold that you could get. The day is nearly over descending in to grey you’re better off staying here now you are already wet and they need not see for what they pay.

You are feeling very twitchy it is hours since your last fix your stomach is turning somersaults and your mood is between and betwixt.You watch people passing the end of your little patch some with shopping some with children all with lives you’d love to snatch.

School children walking home ipods in their ears  you pick up their discarded cigarettes and wistfully long for their, undone homework fears. Life is so simple for them and some are older than you. They would spill their guts and run a mile had they had to do some of the things you do.

If you did not feel so dizzy you really would stand up you need to tart your face up and put on a smile the punters will be out soon so you need to practice your smile. You hope and pray that you can score tonight the cramps are getting worse and your legs are not up to running so there is no point in pinching some old dears purse.

You marvel at the fact that these men will still use you, you look a mess and smell even worse but still you thank God that they do. Why is your head thumping, you’ve not felt that way before have you got enough cash for a sandwich you’ve some money in your back pocket of that you’re pretty sure.

Why can’t you stand up you push your hand down on the floor. God what is this, is it blood it is, it is all over your hands and more. Your legs have turn to jelly and you have never felt so cold your chest feels tight and your guts hurt you so, you need to move you feel a hundred years old.

There is someone coming , you reach out for help , they see the blood, they are so shocked they let out a yelp. They haven’t stopped they have left you here what are you to do.Your life’s blood is leaving you fast and as you shed a tear it all begins to go black suddenly, yet you feel no fear.

“Some one call an ambulance, but I think it is too late . How could she just be left here and in such a state.”

Running for my life

I am lonely I am lost I have run away but at what cost.Thankfully the door was left ajar so I ran and ran, oh! so far. He had forgotten to secure my rope so now I run, escape is my only hope.

Running for my life

I ran down to the beach I needed to hide and get out of reach. I don’t want another day hungry and cold praying he will stay away.The sound of his voice makes me shake and shiver, the feeling of his angry blows make me quiver.

I can see lights up ahead, lets get off the road if it is him he will beat me until I’m dead. OH! I feel so cold and weak  I can’t go on I just want to sleep.All my body racked with pain I fear and dread being caught and taken back again.

I hated that filthy dirty shed were soiled wet rags were my only bed. Sadly I was always hungry I only ever got scraps that stank and water that leaked from the outside rusty tank.

I just long for any love, not cruel hard fists reining on me from up above. A nice dry place for me to sleep and some food that I can eat. I swear I would honour and love someone to earn my keep.

I need a rest

It is no good I have done my best this corner looks safe I need to take a rest. I Just hope he is not around I am so scared of being found.  Sleeping the sleep of the scared I remember all the kickings and beatings, all my howls,yet, no one ever heard.

What’s that noise, is it a car door Oh! No ,Oh! No not him I can’t take any more. I hungry and cold and my paws are so sore. I can’t bare to look I shall just stay still.If  it is him I give up I have no more will.

Hello boy (a gentle voice) let me see , Oh! you are hurt let me help, you need not fear me. Kindly hands stroke my painful back a gentle stroke not hit or smack.

Look at you, you have been through the mill you are a strong one aren’t you, all those injuries and you are going still. Let me take you along with me and we will soon have you looking better and happy.

Gently hands pick me up and lay me cosy in the back of a truck. Covering me with a blanket giving me a gentle kiss is this all happening is it real it feels like bliss.

Can we keep him Daddy please he is so lovely, a little child is hugging me knelt next to me on it’s knees. Careful Jake we don’t know what he is like, careful in case he bites. I shall never bite the hand that loves me these new humans I could never hurt.

Bending down the new man says your okay boy you can stay.